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Boozy Icebox Cake

My students teach me life lessons every day.

That’s something teachers are supposed to say in order to earn their Good Teacher Badge, but for me it’s also true. For example, this past Thursday I found myself in a complicated situation on the internet (oh, the internet), and handling it live with my students’ input proved to be one of the most educational experiences I think we’ve had all year. It all started with a negative book review . . .

At the beginning of 7th grade, my students read a young adult mystery novel set in Japan. It’s not my favorite book in terms of writing or character development, but it serves my purpose each year: to introduce them to Japan in an engaging and accessible way, and to serve as a backdrop and vehicle, respectively, for our more in-depth studies of haiku and essay organization in class. Essentially, I have my reasons for keeping it in the curriculum, but I don’t personally love it.

On my personal account on a popular book review site, I said as much. The site is designed to allow you to share book reviews and ratings with friends, so I felt perfectly comfortable giving my honest and blunt opinion. It was around four years ago when I reviewed the novel, saying, in short, that the simplicity of the book annoyed me.

Imagine my surprise when the author of the book himself — I’ll call him Snarky McSnarkerson — responded to my review. He was defensive and implied that the reason I didn’t like his book was because, basically, I’m a stuffy old teacher who’s not in touch with what kids actually like. This was funny to me, since part of what draws me to middle school language arts is my adoration of young adult literature.

I responded with a touch of sarcasm. It was not the most angelic response, but also not inappropriate. In class, I mentioned the exchange to my students and expressed my surprise over the whole affair. It didn’t occur to me that they might search for the review online, but a few of them found it and also responded to Snarky McSnarkerson. I was proud of how they were supportive of me but also classy and mature in their responses, not resorting to rudeness or immature name-calling. Indeed, they were quite a bit more mature than Snarky McSnarkerson himself! I thanked them but also asked that they no longer fuel the discussion.

A few years passed. Then, this past Thursday, I received another response from McSnarkerson out of the blue.

In his new response, he not only insulted me (saying that maybe someday my students would get a “real teacher”), but also my students (pointing out the grammatical errors in their posts). I was livid. I responded curtly to McSnarkerson himself and posted about the situation on Facebook (where it was promptly shared by a prominent author). In disbelief, I told my current students about the situation, being careful this time to ask them not to contribute to the online exchange. They were all outraged to hear of McSnarkerson’s rudeness and his unfair implications, just like I had been.

I knew this was a ripe teaching moment about how to navigate the internet, and how in the real world, we can vote with our wallets (I’d already told McSnarkerson I wouldn’t be using his book anymore). But I didn’t expect for my students to be quite the wonderful teachers they turned out to be!

We chatted about the inevitable urge to gang up on someone with friends online, and how we must remember that to do so would be cruel. We talked about the difference between responding to be nasty and responding with a thoughtful point. We remembered examples of when people had been unkind to others in groups — like the comments on Rebecca Black’s music video, “Friday,” and how they must have made her feel.

While we were discussing the uncertainty involved in handling an online disagreement effectively, my unfailingly positive and practical student, Lauren, raised her hand. She humbly offered the class, “I learned that if you stop responding to someone and fueling a situation, it usually goes away.” I think her comment literally stopped me in my tracks. What a novel idea. Wasn’t I supposed to be the one saying the wise, mature stuff? I laughed.

“That’s a great point, Lauren. So maybe I shouldn’t have responded to McSnarkerson at all? Or maybe I shouldn’t have responded to his newest comment? And, oh. Maybe I shouldn’t have mentioned it on Facebook?” The whole class paused with me. We all shifted and grinned uneasily. A new discussion had begun: Could Ms. Ruble have navigated the internet in a more effective way?

In true language arts style, we journaled about it. I told them to imagine that they’d left a negative review of Harry Potter and J.K. Rowling had just sent them a nasty comment (we all agreed this scenario was ridiculous — who doesn’t love Harry Potter and Rowling? — but for the sake of journaling, they used their imagination.) They had to first write their initial impulse, and then think of at least two better strategies they could use to handle it productively.

I was so proud of their suggestions. They proposed:

-Write out the response you’d initially want to post, but then ball it up and throw it away instead.
-Write a response, but instead of posting it, send it to someone you trust to edit it.
-Write a response, but instead of immediately posting it, wait 24 hours and then revise it to make sure it’s productive and kind.
-Don’t respond at all.
-No matter what you do, don’t share the situation with others to gang up or gossip, because it creates a bigger problem.

I love when real-life situations come about that they can learn from. I love it even more when they can learn from someone else’s mistakes instead of their own — even if those mistakes are mine! My initial goal in posting my frustrations and a link to the exchange on Facebook was to bring to public light the author’s unkind actions. If I had it to do over again, though, I might handle it in a different way (this is the reason I’m not naming the author or linking to the exchange in this post). Maybe I’d use one of the effective ways my students proposed. And instead of public shaming, I can “voice” my feelings about McSnarkerson by not buying his products.

I appreciate these kids more each and every day.

* * *

After all that tension, I needed to whip up an easy dessert this weekend, and there is nothing easier than an icebox cake. Icebox cakes layer wafer or sandwich cookies with billowy whipped cream and then chill it to form a delicious, velvety, cake-like dessert. I decided to spike my cream with some almond liqueur for a tasty zing, and now I can’t stop eating this thing. I love that something that takes 5 minutes to prepare can end up so pretty and tasty. Enjoy!

How do you effectively handle disagreements online, where it’s so much easier to be unkind or act rashly?

One year ago: Healthy Roasted Tomato and Onion Bread Soup
Two years ago: Willow Bird Baking’s Best of 2010
Three years ago: Pumpkin Cheesecake Bread Pudding

Boozy Icebox Cake


Recipe by: Adapted from Smitten Kitchen, originally adapted from The Magnolia Bakery Cookbook
Yield: 6-8 servings

Icebox Cake is so easy, fast, and delicious. It’s probably the dessert with the biggest bang for your buck. This version is made with oreo cookies and a bunch of whipped cream — and Amaretto for a zing! The cream softens the oreos as they chill overnight into a velvety, cake-like dessert.

Ingredients:
3 cups heavy cream
1/4 cup almond liqueur (like Amaretto) (optional)
3 tablespoons sugar
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
2 packages chocolate sandwich cookies (like Oreos)*
*You might want an extra package on hand in case your trifle dish is larger.

Directions:
Fit a mixer with a whisk attachment and whisk the heavy cream, almond liqueur (if using), sugar, and vanilla extract together in a large chilled bowl until it forms soft peaks. In a trifle dish, arrange a single layer of oreo cookies (for my dish, I used between 8-11 cookies per layer, since the sides flare outward) in a circle, with a cookie or two in the middle. Carefully spread about a 1/2 cup of whipped cream over this first layer. Repeat layering cookies and whipped cream, ending with a layer of whipped cream on top. Crumble a last cookie over the top. Cover and refrigerate overnight before serving.

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You Need To Make This Lemon Cheesecake Braid

Lemon Cheesecake Braid
Lemon Cheesecake Braid

I’m in NoDa, and it makes me want to write poetry and take pictures. But mostly, write pictures. Mostly about babies on hips and tall-tree streets where I am completely lost. I mean, no one can find me here. I could live my whole life here lost.

It’s funny, the district in the city trying to be the most avant-garde makes me feel like the most traditional mommy.

Elias’s eyes are the most beautiful hazel. In the dark they look a wide, deep brown with the longest lashes. In the light the blues show through. Blue-grays, really. He’s walking now. I told Mike, it’s funny… you don’t see this little boy for two weeks and he’s completely different. I saw him take some of his first little steps with those chubby feet, and now he can take at least ten before he falls on his little bottom. It’s a risky venture.
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Spiked Biscoff Cookie Icebox Cake (only 5 ingredients!)

In college, I noticed that the goal of English teachers seemed to be to complicate things. This annoyed me at the time, but I figured maybe I was imagining it. Then I became an English teacher, and now I can say for sure that I was not imagining it. I do try to create a certain level of uncertainty in the discussions I start and the projects I give my students. They, in turn, are annoyed.

But I think I’m in good company: if God had simply wanted us to get to a final, clear, unequivocal answer, He could’ve knocked us over the head with a lightning bolt and spelled it out. But He sent prophets; Christ spoke in parables; “signs” were not literal signs with, like, letters and things. There was a level of indirectness there that wasn’t an accident. Something about the process of being confused, searching for information, unwinding the data, living in the mystery — something about the journey was the destination.

In our most recent project, my students graphed the intensity of different plot points from a novel. The goal is to get them to examine the structure of a story using some techniques they’ve learned about making visual comparisons from math. It’s cool. They hate it.

Here’s why: they don’t know what their axes should look like. They’re not sure what to do when two points overlap. They inevitably encounter a problem with where to graph things that happen in “winter” — at the beginning or end of a year? If they were doing this project at home, I think they would probably (with parental permission, of course) set it on fire and dance on the ashes.

But they’re doing this project in my classroom, and I don’t allow matches. Plus I sing and dance and guide and encourage, so they usually don’t quite reach the arson level of frustration.

One day, sensing a particularly acute sense of hopelessness in a couple of students, I stopped the class and let them in on my little secret. “Don’t feel sad when you reach a problem, or think that that means you’re failing at your project work. Actually, I put problems in on purpose. Teachers are a little sadistic like that.” Cue lots of groaning.

“Really, though, I think sometimes we’re used to school projects feeling like a ride downhill on a bike: wheeeeee! and then we’re at the bottom, easy as pie. But in the real world, projects aren’t like that at all. I’m trying to get you ready for the real world — in fact, you’re really already IN the real world! — so it doesn’t do any good to have you just glue stuff on a poster all day. In the real world, you get on your bike and start pedaling and BAM, there’s a huge wall. You can sit at the base of the wall and feel sad about it, or you can try a few things. Some of them might not work. But eventually you’ll find some footholds and climb up. When you get to the other side, you’ll realize that you now know how to climb a wall! And you feel strong and capable! Awesome!

“Then you’ll keep on jogging along and eventually, BAM, there’s a deep moat. With, like, piranhas. And you could sit down and give up, but you could also try some things. You might try some of the wrong things and get your fingers nibbled a little. But eventually you’ll realize that music puts the piranhas to sleep and if you do the backstroke, you have enough energy and lung capacity to get across the water while singing “Row, Row, Row Your Boat.” And when you climb out on the other side, you’ll realize that you now know how to get past a moat! And you’ll feel even more strong and capable! Awesome!

“Eventually you’ll get to your destination, and instead of feeling like gravity took you there, or like you just wasted a lot of glue and poster board for no real reason, you’ll know that you learned something and grew throughout the process. No pain, no gain, as they say!”

My reassurance speech was long and a little quirky — my students will all tell you that that’s just how I roll — but I could tell their spirits were lifted. They’d been running into problems and thinking, “Uh-oh, I’m on the wrong track” instead of, “Okay, another challenge! Let’s go!” It’s a hard mental switch to make unless someone with the right amount of authority and insight into your situation can come by and give you permission to make it: “Hey, just so you know, even though it seems uncertain, you’re on the right track!”

I don’t know about you, but I very much understand their struggle. My life is my major project, and I often hit a wall or a moat. My reaction is usually: “Okay, that was the complete wrong path. I might’ve ruined everything. Whiiine.”

The funny thing is that someone with the right amount of authority and insight into my situation has already given me permission to make the mental switch and change my perspective. He’s given me all the information I need to feel optimistic in the face of obstacles, knowing they’re going to be productive and that I’m going to be safe in the long run. After telling his disciples about many coming troubles, Jesus said, “These things I have spoken to you, so that in Me you may have peace. In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world” (John 16.33 NASB). Someone please remind me of that next time I’m grabbing for the matches.

Do you find it easy to remain optimistic during your struggles, or difficult?

At the end of a long post about struggles, I thought I’d share a super simple recipe with you. This icebox cake only has 5 ingredients and is a cinch to throw together, but is also indulgent and delicious. It’s a riff off of the ubiquitous and well-loved Oreo Icebox Cake, but uses Lotus Biscoff Cookies because they are insane. A little Goldschlager in the whipped cream enhances the cinnamon flavor and gives this chilled dessert a nice bit of “heat.” Enjoy!

One year ago: Eggs à l’Oignon
Two years ago: (Freshly Picked!) Strawberry Cream Pie
Three years ago: Caramel Cream Croquembouche

Spiked Biscoff Cookie Icebox Cake


Recipe by: Willow Bird Baking
Yield: would easily feed 10 people

Icebox cakes are amazing, and spiked icebox cakes are amazinger. With 5 ingredients and 15 minutes of prep, you have a gorgeous, delicious dessert!

Ingredients:
4 cups heavy cream
1/4 cup goldschlager (or cinnamon liquor or liquor of your choice)
1/2 cup powdered sugar
2 packages Lotus Biscoff cookies
caramel sauce for topping (optional; I used store-bought but this is a great from-scratch recipe)

Directions:
Combine cold cream, goldschlager, and powdered sugar in a chilled mixing bowl and beat to stiff peaks. Taste it to be sure the alcohol/sweetness ratio works for your tastebuds. In a trifle dish, place a layer of Biscoff cookies along the bottom, breaking them to fit as needed. Dollop whipped cream on top and spread it over the cookies to form about 1/4 inch layer of cream. Continue layering cookies and cream until you’re out of cookies, finishing with a layer of cream. Cover the dish and let it chill overnight so the cookies are softened. Heat the caramel sauce and then let it cool a bit so it won’t melt the cream. Drizzle it over top of the trifle and serve.

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Thick Spiced Rum Coquito (Puerto Rican Eggnog)

Thick Spiced Rum Coquito (Puerto Rican Eggnog)
Thick Spiced Rum Coquito (Puerto Rican Eggnog)

NOT A SINGLE ONE OF YOU BOTHERED TO TELL ME ABOUT PUERTO RICAN EGGNOG SO WE’RE IN A FIGHT. Except we’re not because I wanna tell YOU about Puerto Rican eggnog so we have to make up. Have you ever had coquito?!

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Creamy Broccoli Cheese Dip

Thanks to RW Garcia for sponsoring this post.

Creamy Broccoli Cheese Dip
Creamy Broccoli Cheese Dip

I’ve got your holiday potluck contribution covered. Dips are one of my favorite dishes to make for friends to share, and this Creamy Broccoli Cheese Dip is incredible: so simple to whip up and so delicious.

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